Film Intel's Fight Club - Drive vs Drive

Nicolas Winding Refn's highly acclaimed Drive hits UK cinemas on Friday, with Ryan Gosling taking the lead as a stuntman-cum-getaway driver. However, it's not the first Drive on the cinematic block. The accolade of being the second-most-famous Drive goes to Steve Wang's 1997 action-comedy, which starred Mark Dacascos as a genetically altered super-fighter on the run from a selection of no-good hitmen. Which Drive will prevail in the Film Intel Fight Club? Gosling, ready? Dacascos, ready? Fight!

First Google Image Result (above)

Ah, now, there could have been a flaw in the plan here because, obviously, searching for 'Drive' and, erm, 'Drive' produces the same image. The only remedy to this was to search on release year as well, which produced the above posters. Both films lose points for being inconvenient.

Drive '11: 7/10
Drive '97: 6/10

Best Piece Of Parental Guidance On IMDb

Both of these should be goldmines for the usually hilarious IMDb nuggets but, sadly, they're both rather tame. Drive '97 in fact has nothing to show for its parent guide, whilst Drive '11 just has fairly sensible descriptions of what happens during the film. Could it be that (shock, horror, is this a sign of the apocalypse?) this IMDb feature is actually starting to be used correctly?

Drive '11: 4/10
Drive '97: 0/10

Best Character Name

Drive '11 goes for unmitigated cool, from Gosling's character (Driver) to the anonymous hoodlums (Tan Suit) but scroll down and you will find a certain Mr Bearded Redneck, which is always nice to see. Drive '97 has several crackers starting with two villains called Hedgehog and Razor Scarred. Top award though goes to the late Brittany Murphy, playing the fantastically named Deliverance Bodine.

Drive '11: 7/10
Drive '97: 9/10

Best Quote

Drive '11 is unlucky here. A lack of updating means it only features the dialogue from the trailer. Drive '97 has a lot of great dialogue that doesn't look as great when it's on the page. The best is probably this little exchange: 'Malik Brody: The image that Americans have of China is that's it's a country full of people with little tiny feet, and they run around and kick the shit out of each other every day. /
Toby Wong: Well that's the same image we have of America, except you guys have big feet and kick the shit out of each other less gracefully.'

Drive '11: 1/10
Drive '97: 6/10

Best Comparison

Drive '11 is like 'a godsend from the cinematic heavens—an air-tight, stripped-down, heart-rending, blood-drenched, anxiety-fuelled godsend, but a godsend all the same' according to one review. Trying to find comparisons of a film released fourteen years ago but sharing the name of a film released this week is an effort somewhat above my pay grade. Lets just assume that someone, somewhere, compared it to something.

Drive '11: 6/10
Drive '97: 1/10

Best Tweet

Amazingly, someone has tweeted about Drive '97 and that honour goes to @choobanicus who says 'There's already a film called Drive. It stars Mark Dacascos and it's awesome'. Too right, Sir! There's a few to choose from with Drive '11 but none quite as bizarrely formed as this from a certain Mr @DannyDeVito; '"Drive" is a ride! Ryan Gosling cool movie! Bryan Cranston Ron Perlman Christina Hendricks, my man Albert Brooks! Carey Mulligan Sweet!'.

Drive '11: 9/10
Drive '97: 5/10

Best Rotten Tomatoes Review

Like any widely reviewed film there's a fair amount of guff and cliché on Drive '11's page. Erik Childress' summation that 'Drive is quite simply the best film that Michael Mann never made in the period where Thief, Manhunter and the scores of Giorgio Moroder and Tangerine Dream secreted off the screen and into our veins' rises above it. Drive '97 comes up empty.

Drive '11: 7/10
Drive '97: 0/10

Best Piece Of IMDb Trivia

Drive '11's claim that 'In preparation for his role, Ryan Gosling restored the 1973 Chevy Malibu that his character uses in the film' will probably only fuel the man love for Gosling still more. Drive '97 puts a sad finish on affairs by once again turning over a blank.

Drive '11: 7/10
Drive '97: 0/10

Both films suffer from yet-to-be populated categories but the relative obscurity of Drive '97 means it comes off far worse, with a lowly score of just 27/80. The uber-coolness of Drive '11's noir inflections see it past the post with a score of 48/80

Film Intel's Fight Club: where two films get pushed head-to-head over such irreverent issues as 'first Google image result' and 'best IMDb parental guidance entry'. All films are marked out of ten on each topic with a possible maximum score of 80 - it won't tell you anything about the quality of the film (or will it?) but it might give you a few giggles. Or it might not. We'll see.

No comments:

Post a Comment